A Dad Living IN...

One of the hardest aspects of being a Husband and a Dad is being authentic in the small spaces.

(with the Action Journal release I'll post some thoughts on this Live UP / IN / OUT Family on Mission rhythm...starting now)

Living IN is found in that tension between being sinful man and righteous child of God. Of being both a strong man as well as a humble boy in the face of adversity. Of bold leadership in decision making and meek submission at the same time.

To worship the Father as a living sacrifice right here in this home, in this neighborhood, of the edge of those famous mountains...and to do so without pomp and faux-perfection and all of this right before the eyes of the same family that experiences my imperfections and witness' my weakness' daily is a wild spot to be in.

There is no hiding my shortcomings when it comes to derailed home projects, disappointments, hurts and missed expectations. So why on earth is there a false expectation for glam and show when it comes to my spiritual walk, my faithful living, right here in my home?

To Live IN as a Dad is:
to be honest about my gifts and abilities endowed by the Spirit.
to be open about my weakness' as a maturing disciple.
to be bold in faith in private and public as opportunity allows.
to be humble in circumstance as the Lord works.
to seek forgiveness when I'm wrong and hurtful.
to teach forgiveness when my kids are wrong and hurtful.
to model my faith in Christ as a slave to righteousness.
to model repentance as a slave to righteousness.
to love despite...
to allow myself to be loved despite...
to love my wife as Christ loves the Church.
to love my kids as the Fathers loves His.
to party.
to enjoy.
to discern.
to discipline.
to engage the Word in real time and in truth.
to engage the Word in our lives in real time and with grace.

The fruit of Living IN on purpose most intentionally this past year has been invaluable. Seriously. There has never been a more intentional season of life getting my house in order. I'm not talking about finances and comfort and career and ordering a serene and sterile home. No. Dear Lord No.

I mean a rekindling of Husbandry (not that kind). A reordering of values and expectations as a parent, as a Dad. A discovery through trial and error and discernment of how we engage IN here in my home.

Someone asked recently how discipling my kids interconnects with this Family on Mission Action Journal. Great Q! The Action Journal engages my family in disciplmaking a few of different ways:

• It offers us the opportunity to engage each area of life without neglecting the others (UP / IN / OUT).
• My wife and I discover more and more how we engage Word together. How we teach and model Truth at home, along the road, in our strengths and weakness'.
• It's all intentional, challenging, and full of kairos moments to experience and discern. Some things we won't do again. Ever. They're one-off experiences. This is part of discovering how we engage Jesus together in ways that will become part of our weekly / monthly rhythm. (and ways that won't)
• It fosters creative space for 1x1 kairos moments more and more so they become a natural part of our relationships and calendar rhythms.

One-off events are good. When they lead to the discovery of rhythmic mission and greater familial vision they're freakin' awesome!

So how does discipling my kids connect with the Action Journal? Deeper discipleship is fostered on mission together. And intentional / relational / exponential rhythmic time in the Word in the context of real experiences, struggles, convictions, discoveries and faith together is a fruit worth fostering on purpose.

Yep, being a dude for Christ in the home is a wild ride. It's painful and pure joy. Living IN with the good and the bad is invaluable.

Are you experiencing a Live IN life?
Are you open about your crap?
Are you engaging your gifts?
Are you a team? For real. Are you running the race together together? Or are you running the race together apart?

NOW AVAILABLE: Action Journal!

IT"S HERE! A Family on Mission Action Journal is here and ready to roll...

In honor of the release of A Family on Mission Action Journal I thought I'd share my family shared in a Live UP adventure this weekend.

A page from our Action Journal

I'm a pretty big fan of finding, making or recreating space for my family to shake off dusty old expectations of how a Christian family orders their life and one way my wife and I do this is to skip Sunday morning gatherings with the greater Church body and lead worship in our living room once in a while.

This weekend we did just that! Here's how it rolled and it did NOT roll smoothly, but it was absolutely worthwhile:

PART ONE: We woke up.
Pretty simple step (most of the time).

The kids played with Legos and I sipped on coffee. Around 10am, which is the time we typically connect with the Body, we rallied in the living room to an upbeat Newsboys song and got some energy moving about our minds and bodies.

To be honest it totally derailed at this point with my son. I won't say too much about his attitude because I don't want to embarrass him but let's just say it went sour and disrespect was high. Because worshipping God is a privilege and not a right I sent my boy to his room while my wife, daughter and I dove in.

Then it got better. My daughter started crying because of my sternness with her brother. Real nice.

After a few moments I brought my son downstairs, discussed his actions, struggled through some apologies on his part and a few hugs later his attitude was totally different and his mind was clear and ready to engage. And we all did just that.

PART TWO: Teaching & Discussion.
Seriously. My son is in first grade and my daughter is three. So as we read through James 3 and the wild nature of our speech and heart comparing it to horses and ships and forests we drew some pictures together about each image and how they compare to our tongue, our words and our hearts and actions.

How appropriate that we had an attitude meltdown earlier and we totally used it as an example of two things:

1. How our hearts and mouths can impact our time with God and with others both positively and negatively.
2. How redemption and reconciliation look when we're humbled and willing to seek forgiveness and then reshape our words and mindset with Jesus' direction.

'With the tongue we praise our Lord and Father...' James 3:9

PART THREE: Activities
After 15 minutes in the Word and discussion we dove into a craft depicting the tongue and it's work in our lives.

We followed this up with about 5 or 6 more upbeat worship songs from YouTube. Once in a while we sang together and paused to read the lyrics but honestly, we simply had fun jumping and dancing and singing together.

There's this idea that missing a large Church gathering on the weekend will demonstrate to our kids that we don't really take God seriously as Christians. And worse, that being a true disciple means showing up every weekend to earn salvation points or to prove to others that we really are believers. Like perfect Sunday attendance is a true sign of spiritual integrity in Christ.

Well, you can assume I don't agree with any of that and in fact spending this time as a family, leading as parents, praying together, creatively engaging the Word together and modeling a Christlikeness that truly goes beyond a Weekend Church Service in my experience carries a beautiful spiritual weight and fosters a spiritual fruit many of us miss out on in our homes.

CHALLENGE:

1. Check out the Family Action Journal.
2. Open the door a little more to being a Family on Mission!

Action Journal Nearly in Action

It's simple. Disciples are given the opportunity to make more disciples.

Drawn by God. Saved by Christ. Filled with the Spirit. The body of Christ, the Church, the priesthood of believers have this beautiful mission - love others as Christ loves us. Christ reconciled us to Him and as ambassadors of reconciliation we direct others to Christ and draw them into our families and extended families on mission.

This doesn't always start in our homes does it? We come to Christ at the strangest times and in the weirdest most unexpected places right? Coffee shops, funerals, next to the toilet after a long night. God calls and gives us the grace to respond to Jesus' incarnate work and it doesn't matter where or how.

a great disciple and partner on mission

But when this call changes us in every place but the home (the most intimate) it's a problem. Our spouses don't see a broken, forgiven, regenerate husband, wife, mother or father. Our neighbors might. Our coworkers see a change. Our local church body is in awe and spurs us onward. But do our kids feel the new creation. Is that same grace spilling over onto our family. Is our spouse held tight by us in love and forgiveness the way we are in Christ's arms?

Let's be careful not to draw families on mission independently of one another in every area of life but to let our individual gifts and missions be an overflow of a discipling rhythm in the home.

After Moses personally engaged YHVH on the mountain he called Israel to a great mission. A great rhythm of life. Read more in Deuteronomy 6:4-9 about the family discipleship rhythm designed to create nation in love with their Redeemer.

my little partner on mission
and apparently stung by a bee...

I'm excited. We've received a final draft of the Journal and are pretty pumped to share this rhythm with others. No, as disciples we're not prompted to shutter up our families in the house to keep safe from the big bad world. That's ridiculous.

On the other extreme, if we're all engaged in the body and even on mission outside of the home and never worshipping, partying and serving together as a family then as parents we're missing out on discipling those entrusted to us directly from the Lord first and foremost. Our children then miss out on how a family lives and breathes the Word.

So go and create your own Action Journal. If you need a hand then pick up A Family on Mission Action Journal when it's out later this month!

The Internal Debate of the Family on Mission

So I'm pretty excited about the Family on Mission Action Journal coming out next month. I thought I'd take a minute and share some thoughts on the making of the journal.

I've had this internal debate going on for months now regarding the making and sharing of this journal. It began as an overflow of the discovery process with my wife on what it looks like for the Christ-centered family (our family) to live out Gospel truth together.

Leaning into 3dm's Up / IN / OUT discipleship rhythm we've been worshipping, learning, playing and serving on purpose in our home, neighborhood and network. Creating and taking opportunities as they come.

In the past few years we've come to realize that while each individual believer is gifted by the Spirit to serve the body and engage the world differently, the Apostle Paul really engages this teaching, as a family unit we're designed to live a Christ-centered rhythm together in ways no other space can replicate.

The local Church offers so much opportunity for personal discovery of these gifts that Dad can minister to the body regularly in a different spaces than Mom. Mom and daughter never have to cross paths in between the women and student ministries. Father and son can be engaged in totally separate multi-evening weekly events and never really share a 1x1 meal engaging in healthy Kairos moments together.

So as my wife and I have been discovering and recreating a healthier family rhythm I've been wrestling with whether or not I'm qualified as a healthy and maturing father, husband and disciple of Christ to offer my understanding of the Biblical call to live on mission as a family with others. It's a humble position to be in to ask another to engage in a particular rhythm of mission that I'm personally convicted about. It's one thing to attempt to live it out in my home and quite another to invite others to invest in a resource that I have invested in.

So while some days I feel like a failure and other days victorious in my walk - this internal debate is healthy as it propels me to desire Christlike maturity as developed and defined by Scripture. It's unhealthy in that it causes me to negatively compare myself with other mature believers which stunts my ability to see clearly the simple nature of sharing Truth that the Spirit has shared with me.

'Let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, since as members of one body you were called to peace. And be thankful. Let the word of Christ dwell in you richly as you teach and admonish one another with all wisdom, and as you sin psalms, hymns and spiritual sons with gratitude in your hearts to God. And whatever you do, whether in word or deed, do it all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him.' - Colossians 3:15-17

That said, the Family on Mission Action Journal is on its way. The debate is nearly over. Peace and Word are doing their work and Thankfulness is the result.

It's a resource. A tool. An opportunity to propel our families toward discovering a healthy rhythm of life together as long as your season of parents and children share space under one roof - your roof.

Dwell in the word.
Sing together.
Serve together.
Pray together.
Eat together.
Play together.
Commune together.

This Action Journal is a way of taking the most practical elements of engaging Christ and His call to engage the our families and those closest to us together and tossing them on our dinner tables to discuss, pray about and creatively engage in our home and in our neighborhoods.

And I'm incredibly excited to hear your family stories on mission.

Which events, activities, passages, experiences, spaces and moments open doors for you and your family to engage the muddy waters of lifestyle disciplemaking.

Let discipleship be an overflow of your family life - not an added element of volunteerism in your weekly endeavors!

January 2015 Book Release / A Family on Mission Action Journal

A Family on Mission Action Journal  /  Coming January 2015

Check out my first forthcoming Action Journal dedicated to fostering intentional family life in Christ together. Get active on purpose and regularly at that! Next Year (January 2015) order a copy for your family - and one for each of the families in your Missional Community. Get active together one day at a time.

Live UP / Live IN / Live OUT  This rhythm of life as a family dedicated to growing in Christ personally and together AND engaging Jesus' call to make disciples who make disciples is a wild adventure. On our journey to engage our neighbors and network with the Gospel together as a family we need a little encouragement from time to time.

Journey together through UP - IN - OUT adventures, journal about the events, the people involved, the work of the Spirit and the fruit you'll be praying about for future relationship and mission.

Being missional as a disciple of Christ is most rewarding when it's the overflow of our Deuteronomy 6:4-9 family life rhythm. It's most fruitful when it leads to discipling relationships both inside and outside the home.

Are you enjoying the call of Christ right here in your home?

A Family on Mission Action Journal / The Next Absolutely Unprofessional Publication coming January 2015.